Part 13

Emily and Olivia stayed clear of the obvious subject during lunch. Olivia sensed that if she brought it up it would probably keep Emily from eating anything at all and it already didn’t look good the way she was picking at her food like that,. “hows everything with Marc? “ she asked. “ah its ok. Nothings changed you know. We re still friends with benefits, which is quite nice actually” “Bullshit…” Emily was thinking but didn’t dare to say it out loud. Is it ok to tell your friend she s been lying to herself for years? Or maybe she wasn’t lying, could she actually like this? But why? She couldn’t understand how someone would like to be in a relationship that was so far from perfect. People were talking about the two of them all the time. They were always judging Olivia for being too available for Marc, thinking he was playing her. But sometimes it seemed to Emily it was the other way around and Olivia was actually quite satisfied with how things were. “Hey by the way, Marc and I were planning on having a little get together after work on Wednesday, feel like you’re up for it yet?” Emily thought about it. She knew that Olivia would only invite one of them either her or Jonathan, and if she wasn’t coming, he definitely would. So the chances of him finding out what she did would be bigger, when she wasn’t there to control the situation. Someone who DID see her might talk or he might ask too many questions. “Sure, I ll be there, what did you guys have in mind?” She tried to sound casual, too many people had told her that she always seemed so aggravated lately. “Oh we were just gonna cook some dinner, have some wine, well a lot really and bitch about our lives.. sounds like fun, doesn’t it?” It really didn’t but she wasn’t gonna say anything so she just forced a heartfelt smile and took a sip from her Diet Coke. “Do you need me to prepare anything?” “Nah its alright, we ll take care of everything..try to relax a bit, I know you can use the break”. “But you wont…? “I wont invite Jonathan of course”. She didn’t know why she even asked. It made her seem weak. She also didn’t know why she cared in front of Olivia, but she suddenly regretted having told her so much about that night she didn’t remember.

Sundays had always been their favorite day. They had be sleeping in and spending the morning just talking and watching movies in bed. Then Emily would usually get a bad conscience about being so lazy dragging them outside to go for a walk with some friends or grab a bite to eat. But it was always their day.
There was nothing cozy about this Sunday. It had been pouring all day and Jonathan was in a foul mood. His stomach was still trying to deal with the booze from Friday and he felt like the only thing he would be able to eat was the cold burgers he had gotten in his drunken haze after the party and just found on his bedside table. After the shower yesterday he had climbed back into bed and fallen into some sort of coma. But that had to end eventually and he had to try to figure out what happened two nights ago. He had checked with Danny if he wanted to join him when meeting Oliver. That guy had never been his favorite person in the world and he felt a little awkward meeting with him alone, given that that had never ever happened before. Danny wasn’t up for it. Despite his own hangover he had gone out again the night after and apparently hooked up with some girl that was “totally awesome” until someone better came along. He was used to this by now and didn’t even really care. Oliver had suggested meeting at a restaurant that recently opened and served overpriced fusion cuisine, something like iced cucumber soup with fresh sea water shrimp and other pretentious crap that Jonathan didn’t care for. But Oliver loved this stuff. To Jonathans knowledge Oliver wasn’t even rich, he didn’t work a fancy job or have family money, he just loved mingling with these people. The ones that needed champagne for breakfast to feel good about themselves. To this day Oliver swore he had never had a Burger in his life because that was just beneath him and when he ordered Spaghetti it seemed like he was ordering a 5 course meal with all the extra wishes and needs the guy had. Yeah it was pretty safe to say that Jonathan didn’t really like him too much. How he became part of their group was still a mystery to him, but it had of course been Danny who introduced him. Danny never judged anyone. Danny never really thought about anyone. The second he met people randomly he d welcome them with open arms as long as they had something interesting to say. How many times had he introduced people to them saying something like: I have no idea what we talked about but this dude is awesome, you gotta meet him” Most of these kids never came back but Oliver stuck. Whatever the reason for that was. Jonathan entered the Restaurant, he thinks the name is Vinegar or Pepper or some other sort of kitchen utensil. A tall dark haired chick with a very bored facial expression barely looked up from her computer, screened his shoes, his ripped jeans and finally his face, and if its even possible looked even more bored than before. “How many in your party?” Her arrogance was amazing. Who was she to judge him? “2, maybe the other party is already here, Oliver Kley” He pronounced the word party in a way that she had had to notice that he was making fun of her but if she did he couldn’t see it. Her facial expression was the same. Blank, bored and very disappointed. She could have only been 20 or 22 but she looked like she had seen it all, been everywhere and there was nothing in this world that could shock or impress her or the very least make her smile.
Involuntarily his thoughts went back to Emily. What he loved about her was that even though she herself was far from perfect she always managed to look like everything was just the way it should be right at this moment. She was so interested in life, she would soak up all the information that she was given, even if it was extremely boring stuff, and she d remember everything he had even told her. Also, she couldn’t hide her emotions – at all. When she was happy, she was so happy that her eyes turned into small slits, and her smile was making up her whole face. She hated her happy face but she still didn’t change it. When she was upset, boy he would see it..It was like these cartoon smileys people used in chats, the obvious ones with the tears or the big D for a mouth or the upside down smile. That was her, you always knew what you were getting with her.
The grouchy hostess led him to a table by the window with a view over the city where Oliver was already sitting down sipping champagne and munching on something that looked like dried beans. He was talking on his phone alternating between the ears, seemingly making sure that everyone in the room got that he was an important person that never wasted any time waiting for people in restaurants. Oliver acknowledged him with a curt nod and Jonathan let him finish his conversation. “Sorry man, some chick that doesn’t get the hint.. anyways glad you could make it, how is everything?” Jonathan almost said that he had suggested meeting but decided not to bother “ everything’s good, how about you? Fancy place you chose here”. “ They got the best Kobe beef in this country “ Jonathan already wasn’t listening anymore. When did it become ok for 2 people in their late twenties to talk about the perks of fine dining and pricey aperitifs? “so anyways, you seemed to be awfully interested in meeting me here today, what’s the deal?” He cut right to the chase. This confused Jonathan since Oliver usually was a guy that beat around the bush about everything. “ Well to be honest, I was wondering if you..uhmmm were with us after we left that club on Friday.. I uuhmmm I drank quite a lot so I am not sure what really happened.” “Why is that so important to you?” He smirked like he was getting at something. “It just is.. I don’t like not knowing what happened to me, its just that really…” He was horrible at this. “Oh that’s it then?, well alright, I don’t wanna leave you in the dark then…” another smirk. What the fuck was this guys problem?” “I actually left when you guys got there, so I don’t know what or whom you did after that”. Whom? What did this guy know. He tried to wipe the somewhat shocked look off his face and tried a more casual approach “Oh well I was just wondering, cause I spent a lot of money that night and I just wanted to know if someone ripped me off” there that seemed like a perfectly reasonable excuse why he d wanna know what happened to him but still something told him that Oliver knew more that he was admitting. Suddenly his smirk was gone and he got serious “Look I wasn’t there so I don’t really know, but I wouldn’t care too much. You re a guy, you re allowed some fun, and I am sure it was money well spent.” Smirk back on. Alright Jonathan thought to himself, this was useless, even if this guy knew what had happened he d never tell him, at least not like this and maybe he was just paranoid. So he d just try to enjoy whatever food would come his way and let the bubbly champagne, which quite frankly tasted like regular sparkling wine to him, do the rest.

After lunch Emily had send Olivia home. She didn’t want to talk anymore. Not about the thing that happened, but also not about any chit chat. She just wanted to lie there and watch very meaningless TV, maybe some soap operas or some action movie, or better yet a thriller that would just completely grab all her attention. Over the course of the movie, something with Megan Fox (she remembered that, cause she remembered thinking how much prettier she had looked without all the plastic surgery) she must have fallen asleep. She was dreaming of being lost in a big city, she wasn’t sure which one it was, only that she had seen it before and she was trying to find her way home. Suddenly, a woman came up to her, but instead of a human head she had a dolls face. Not a creepy one, just a regular children’s doll. She was trying to ask the woman for directions when, all of a sudden she slowly pulled a gun out of her purse and shot her. Emily woke up, drenched in sweat, her heart pounding. She wasn’t really afraid but she felt like shit. She looked over to her left, he computer was right there, she was gonna look up what this meant: “To dream that a doll comes to life signifies your desires to be someone else and escape from your present problems and responsibilities. The doll serves as a means to act out your wishes.” Yeah that pretty much summed it up. She d give anything to be someone else right now and to escape from her problems. But acting out her wishes? Could that be right? She wasn’t sure. Had she wanted to do this? Had she wanted to hook up with this stranger that she couldn’t even remember and this was the way her subconscious was showing it to her. She couldn’t imagine that this was true and she pushed away the thesis that didn’t fit her and just stuck with what she felt comfortable with. She was trying to undo what she did. That sounded right, that sounded good, that was what she was going to tell people if they ever asked her. Not that they ever would.


Fairy Dust



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